We need some expert love advice from all of you out there. When you are talking about your ex-significant other while telling a story, do you refer to them as your "ex" -your "friend"- or use their name?
I don't think you should use their first name if the people you're talking to don't know them by name. In this scenario I would use either "ex" or "friend." And if the story has to do with when you were dating this person....perhaps you'd say "My boyfriend/girlfriend at the time." Alot of people don't remain friends after they break up though, so "friend" might not be an option anyway....
But, I do not have a vast amount of experience in this sort of thing. I mean, I'm only 18! I refer to my past "significant others" as all of what you said: "my ex," "my friend," and "their name." It all depends on what kind of mood I'm in, what I'm talking about, and who I'm talking about it with....
I refer most of my ex's by their name, first only though. Some I do consider friends and call them my friend. Some I would love to still beat up. In that case I would call them a--hole. (Can I say that on here?) When interducing my husband to someone I dated back in high school, which by the way was 10 years ago, I just say " This is so and so, he went to school with me." And again, I only interduce them if I really consider them a friend and no interest in them anymore whatsoever. For example, you would never interduce someone that you seriously dated and may at some point have loved. Are you all confused yet.
I would always use their name. If the person you are talking to doesn't know them, simply explain by saying: "Peter, my ex-boyfriend..." That way they understand who you are talking about, and you don't have to resort to saying "my ex" all of the time. After all, exes are people too!
it depends on wether you are speaking of a husband or a signifigant other. And really in this small of a town does it really matter? Everyone knows who you are talking about anyway in this gossipy little town. If you have hard feelings about the "ex" than there are several $%#@ things you could say, but be the bigger person and just refer to them as my ex with an even tone, it makes you the bigger person!!
in reply to CheriRed: that's fine to be the bigger person unless the "ex" was abusive. Won't say any names, but I have heard (yes gossip again) that he now abuses his wife. Thanks god I was smart enough to get out of that relationship. Kinda hard to be the bigger person when he truly was a #@*&. But for the most part the "ex's" are still friends and you don't have to try to be the bigger person, it's easy because you broke up with them on good terms.
Consider using 'my former wife' or my former girlfriend, former husband, etc. If you've been around the block several times you might say my second (wife, husband, girlfriend), or my third, or fourth.... If you've had that many marriages you need to get a clue.
If it's a girlfriend or boyfriend you might say a girl I dated X number of years ago, last year, etc.
Names don't mean anything to those who don't know them/you.
I didnt read all the replys so im not sure if any one else said this but i have been separated for 3 years now and i would never refer to him as my ex anything once i booted him he has no ties whatsoever to me thank god he is now only my childrens father i think anyone who says ex husband ex lover or ex anything still hasnt gotten over that person or that part of their life so for gods sake move on ex is only to be used in one of my favorite words which describes those lil mishaps in life and that word is EXPERIENCED.... ;O}
I will be married to my first wife, fourty years in June. We were engaged for three years before that. I hope I never need refer to her as anything but sweetheart, darlin' or Yes dear.
I have the distinct "pleasure" of refering to my ex as deceased. Although I do have to admit that the motorcycle accident was a terrible way to depart Earth.
love those good ol pappies and grammies for their words of wisdom, and im sure they forgive us when we become adults and learn the value of EX-pression ....right Gary?
If someone knows her ... then her name. If it's someone who doesn't know her or of her, then I use "ex", only because that is the way it is. No hard feelings, just factual, I think ...
I have heard Miles City refered to as the town where you don't lose your partner, you just lose your turn. I can say that since I grew up there. And I find it to be absolutely hilarious also.