Candy corn
Posted by Chuck Schott (+1289) 6 years ago
How do you eat your candy corn?

I had just finished taking my night medicine,a glaucoma med.a blood pressure pill and a Viagra (keeps me from rolling out of bed). I was tired of worrying about the Democrats, the Republicans, Obama, Isil, Syria, Israel, Kangaroos, global freezing/warming, drones, Polar Bears , most snakes, 3 million dollar bombs, home grown anything and EBOLA "its gone air born".

So I decided to eat some crap (never hurts) and I saw my wife had brought home some candy corn (its the season). I open it up and put a dozen in front of me, I started eating them one at a time and soon I noticed I was eating them by layers. I usually ate the white tip then the orange middle and last the yellow or brown bottom piece, occasionally I would eat he fat end first and layer out to the tip but mostly it was tip down, 3 bites.

My wife came out of the bedroom to do some munching and saw the candy corn, look no further candy corn will work. She ate hers the same way I had ate mine, sometimes only two bites but always the tip first and layer out. I thought it would be fun to see how many others eat candy corn (9 billion pieces a year) the same or in a similar manor.

I think it will be statistical high, but why? Is it a shared idiosyncratic behavior or just visual reaction to the layers and colors? OR.... .....NOT ONE other person does this and I double dosed on the glaucoma medicine.

Help me out here, Oh! and I was lying about the air born Ebola (so far).
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Posted by David Schott (+16506) 6 years ago
I can't stand candy corn, but now I know where my kid gets his love of the stuff. I was at the grocery store with him last week and he said, "I can't wait until I'm old enough to have a job. Then I would have money to buy anything I want." I asked, "Is there something you want?" His reply, "Well, I would buy some of that candy corn."



How about this:

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Posted by Jeri Dalbec (+3146) 6 years ago
I can see that you are very serious about methodology in regard to Candy Corn, David. Just trying to think as they are not a favorite as they are so sweet. I do think that they are better if you eat them in layers, though...maybe the nibble at the top being a tad more dainty??? You kind of work up to the finale! Lots to think about to divert oneself from the trials of the world. Thanks!
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Posted by David Schott (+16506) 6 years ago
For the record, it is my really, really old older brother, Chuck, who is passionate about his customs for consuming candy corn. My kickstand works just fine on its own, thank you very much.
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Posted by Gunnar Emilsson (+16669) 6 years ago
Just the picture of Candy Corn Oreos almost sent me into a diabetic coma...and I don't even have diabetes.

I am with Dave. Candy corn is terrible. Though I have to say, as far as a candy associated with a holiday (candy corn : Halloween), there is one worse than that: Peeps.
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Posted by Elizabeth Emilsson (+790) 6 years ago
The only reason I gave you Peeps was because I knew you wouldn't eat them and leave them sitting until they got stale. Stale Peeps are my favorite. And I bought my two little grandsons Peeps ghosts for Halloween. With luck they'll be properly stale by Thanksgiving so I can get them back. Ummmm, stale Peeps .

By the way ,Chuck, that was very amusing for a Republican. And it is the only way a Republican should eat Candy corn.

[This message has been edited by Elizabeth Emilsson (9/25/2014)]
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Posted by Chuck Schott (+1289) 6 years ago
I do believe the sweetness has something to do with the three bite thing on my end. A whole piece is a lot of sweet all at once, perhaps that is all there is to it.

Most Republicans are so sweet very little added sweetness is required, and I dare say 90% of the time if you ask anyone who knows me to describe Mother Ruth's oldest and handsomest son in one word it would be...... sweet.
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Posted by Chuck Schott (+1289) 6 years ago
David,

Get that boy some "walking around money" you just never know when he might need a little candy corn, probably the only treat safe around you.
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Posted by David Schott (+16506) 6 years ago
Thanks for the tip, sweetie.

This all reminds me of one time I was going to get an elitist latte with a former co-worker, Sean. My son who was much younger at the time was with us. As we were walking across the parking lot Sean and I were discussing the day's news or something which caused me to say under my breath so young ears wouldn't hear, "He was arrested for kiddie porn."

But young ears hear too well. My son said, "He was arrested for what?"

Sean gives me a look like, "Well, how are you going to explain this one to a five-year-old?"

Without missing a beat I said to my son, "Candy corn. He was arrested for eating candy corn out of season."

At that we walked through the doorway of the coffee shop and that was the end of that conversation.

Ha ha, I can't believe I said that... Now my kid will probably read this and I will be in trouble all over again.
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Posted by David Schott (+16506) 6 years ago
Okay, fess up. Who printed this out and sent a copy to my mother?
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