Turkey Jokes
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Posted by Richard Bonine, Jr. (+14950) 9 years ago
If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?
Pilgrims!

What key has legs and can't open doors?
A Turkey.

Why did the turkey cross the road?
It was the chicken's day off.

If the Pilgrims were alive today, what would they be most famous for?
Their age

Why can't you take a turkey to church?
Because they use such fowl language

What's the best dance to do on Thanksgiving?
The turkey trot

Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building?
Yes - a building can't jump at all

How can you make a turkey float?
You need 2 scoops of ice cream, some root beer, and a turkey

What kind of music did the Pilgrims like?
Plymouth Rock

Which side of the turkey has the most feathers?
The outside

Why did they let the turkey join the band?
Because he had the drumsticks

Why did the police arrest the turkey?
They suspected it of fowl play

What did the turkey say before it was roasted?
Boy! I'm stuffed!

Where did the first corn come from?
The stalk brought it

Why did the Indian chief wear so many feathers?
To keep his wigwam

What happened to the Pilgrim who was shot at by an Indian?
He had an arrow escape

How did the Mayflower show that it liked America?
It hugged the shore

What happened when the turkey got into a fight?
He got the stuffing knocked out of him.

What's a turkey's favorite song?
"I'm Dreaming of a White Christmas"

Why did the pilgrim eat a candle?
Because he wasn't very hungry and wanted a light snack.

What do you get when you cross a turkey with a banjo?
A turkey that can pluck himself!

Why did the band leader save the drumsticks from 38 turkeys?
Because he wanted seventy-six tom bones.

What is the best thing to put into stuffing?
Your teeth!
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supporter
Posted by Gunnar Emilsson (+17321) 9 years ago
Richard, the second grade called....they want their joke book back.
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Posted by Richard Bonine, Jr. (+14950) 9 years ago
Gunnar, hopefully there is a little bit of second grade left in all of us. Really sad if there isn't.
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Posted by howdy (+4943) 9 years ago
There is in me and my hubby....Just read a few to him LOL...
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