Truths Adults have Learned!
Posted by AJS (+217) 16 years ago
You're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoes and wonder what else you can do while down there.
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Posted by Richard Bonine, Jr (+15535) 16 years ago
People who live in glass houses should get in the basement.
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Posted by Hal Neumann (+10369) 16 years ago
Time is what keeps things from happening all at once.
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Posted by Levi Forman (+3710) 16 years ago
Whether you're rich or poor, it's nice to have money!
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Posted by AJS (+217) 16 years ago
One of the secrets of life is to make stepping stones out of stumbling blocks.
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Posted by Kacey (+3157) 16 years ago
There will always be those who live for power and control because they will never learn what is really valuable in life.
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Posted by Richard Bonine, Jr (+15535) 16 years ago
"You should always go to other people's funerals; otherwise, they won't come to yours."
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Posted by Mr. Natural (+63) 16 years ago
You shouldn't throw stones if you livin in glass houses, and if you got a glass jaw you should watch your mouth.
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Posted by AJS (+217) 16 years ago
Middle age is when you choose cereal for the fiber, not the toy.
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Posted by Cindy (+384) 16 years ago
Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.
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Posted by Mr. Natural (+63) 16 years ago
I got one for you Cindy. "Do not eat green eggs and ham. Do not eat them in a box. Do not eat them with a fox!"
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Posted by emilie q (+34) 16 years ago
Did you ever stop to think and forget to start again
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Posted by AJS (+217) 16 years ago
Measure wealth not by the things you have, but by the things you have for which you would not take money.
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Posted by Toni Campbell Tivy (+141) 16 years ago
Don't squat with yer spurs on.

Never follow good whiskey with water, unless you're out of good whiskey.

Cowboys dance every dance as long as their bladders and feet hold out.

Genius has its limits. Stupidity knows no bounds.

A smile from a good woman is worth more'n a dozen handed out by a bartender.

Real cowboys don't line dance.

There is a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore like an idiot.

Ridin a bronc is like dancin with a girl. The trick is matchin yer partner's rhythm.

Cowboy dress is determined by three factors: weather, work, and vanity.

Reciting poetry is like a haircut. If it's good, ya feel like a million bucks. If it's bad, ya hide yer head under yer hat.

A bronc rider should be light in the head and heavy in the seat.

It takes a big man to cry... but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.

Don't interfere with something that ain't botherin' ya none.

Some men talk 'cause they got somethin' to say. Others talk 'cause they got to say somethin.

Never wrestle with a pig, You both get all dirty, and the pig likes it.

Careful is a naked man climbin' a bobwire fence.

If you can't sing -- dance.

Broke is what happens when a cowboy lets his yearnin's get ahead of his earnin's.

Bein' too positive in your opinions kin get you invited to a dance -- in the street, to the music of shots, nicely aimed.

It takes fewer muscles to smile than to frown... and fewer still to ignore someone completely.

Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.

Never trust a man who agrees with you. He's probably wrong.

The easiest way to eat crow is while it's still warm. The colder it gets, the harder it is to swaller.

If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is to stop diggin'.

Ride the horse in the direction it's goin.

If it don't seem like it's worth the effort, then it probably ain't.

An old timer's a man who's had a lot of interesting experiences -- some of 'em true.

There's two theories to arguin' with a woman. Neither one works.

It don't take no genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.

The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with watches you shave his face in the mirror every morning.

Never ask a barber if ya need a haircut.

Never slap a man who's chewin' tobacco.

Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.

If ya git ta thinkin' yer a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.

Tellin' a man to git lost and makin' him do it are two entirely different propositions.

Don't worry about bitin' off more'n you kin chew; your mouth is probably bigger'n you think.

Always drink upstream from the herd.

Startin' a rumour is like shakin' the feathers out of a pillow case in a wind storm. It's a heck of a lot easier to git rid of 'em than it is to collect 'em back.

If you're ridin' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there with ya.

Never ask a man the size of his spread.

If you come to a fork in the road, take it.

Good judgement comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgement.

When you give a personal lesson in meanness to a critter or to a person, don't be surprised if they learn their lesson.

Generally, you ain't learnin' nothing when your mouth's a-jawin'.

When yer throwin' your weight around, be ready to have it thrown around by somebody else.

Lettin' the cat out of the bag is a helluva lot easier than puttin' it back in.

Always take a good look at what yer about to eat. It's not so important to know what it is, but it's sure crucial to know what it was.

The quickest way to double yer money is to fold it over and put it back in yer pocket.

After eatin an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him.... The moral: When you're full of bull, keep yer mouth shut.

There are three kinds of men, The one that learns by reading, The few who learn by observation, and the rest of them have to pee on the electric fence for themselves.

Never drop your gun to hug a grizzly.

A good horse never comes in a bad color.

Any cowboy can carry a tune. The trouble comes when he tries to unload it.

Behind every successful rancher is a wife who works in town.

Never hold a dustbuster and a cat at the same time.

You can't trust your dog to watch your food.

Never approach a bull from the front, a horse from the rear or a fool from any direction.

Never miss a good chance to shut up.
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Posted by Toni Campbell Tivy (+141) 16 years ago
I thought it would be fun to share a little "Cowboy Wisdom" and I couldn't decide which one of these I liked the best!!
;-)


[This message has been edited by Toni Campbell Tivy (edited 10/21/2006).]

[This message has been edited by Toni Campbell Tivy (edited 10/21/2006).]
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Posted by Richard Bonine, Jr (+15535) 16 years ago
Always drink upstream from the herd.

If life were fair, horses would ride half the time.
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Posted by AJS (+217) 16 years ago
Money will buy a pretty good dog, but it won't buy the wag of his tail.
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Posted by Levi Forman (+3710) 16 years ago
Those were great Toni, especially

Never hold a dustbuster and a cat at the same time.

You can't trust your dog to watch your food.


Came across one just today that I think some of the posters in the politics forum would do well to consider:

Not to be absolutely certain is, I think, one of the essential things in rationality.

- Bertrand Russell
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Posted by AJS (+217) 16 years ago
Be kind. Every person you meet is fighting a hard battle.

Success seems to be largely a matter of hanging on after others have let go.
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Posted by Duncan Bonine (+286) 16 years ago
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
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Posted by Jay Logsdon (+38) 16 years ago
Be the change you wish to see in the world.
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Posted by gypsykim (+1553) 16 years ago
Visualize whirled peas.
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Posted by Richard Bonine, Jr (+15535) 16 years ago
-If voting could really change things, it would be illegal.

-At the feast of ego, everyone leaves hungry.
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Posted by LaRae Weikert (+11) 16 years ago
Free your heart from hatred
Free your mind from worries
Live simply
Give more
Expect less...
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Posted by AJS (+217) 16 years ago
There are two periods when fishing is good.
Before you get there and after you leave.
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Posted by Toni Campbell Tivy (+141) 16 years ago
- If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.


- If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it
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Posted by AJS (+217) 15 years ago
If you want to avoid suspicion, do not stoop to tie your shoe in a melon patch.

Nobody ever puts out a sign that says "NICE DOG".

Always look for the calculations that go with the calculated risks.

There is no job so simple that it cannot be done wrong.

The closest to perfection a person ever comes is when he fills out a job application form.

Keep at least 50 percent of all your investments debt free, that way you can never lose everything.
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Posted by Tony Ackerman (+187) 15 years ago
Arguing with an engineer is like mud wrestling a pig, pretty soon you figure that both enjoy it for the sport!
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Posted by Curt Hammond (+42) 15 years ago
"It is not what you call me, but what I answer to, that matters most."
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Posted by AJS (+217) 15 years ago
Anger is never without reason, but seldom with a good one.
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Posted by Richard Bonine, Jr (+15535) 15 years ago
What if there were no hypothetical questions?
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Posted by Donna Kingsley Coffeen (+407) 15 years ago
Worrying does not empty tomorrow of it's troubles, it empties today of it's strength.
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Posted by AJS (+217) 15 years ago
A road map tells you just about everything except how to refold it.
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Posted by Donna Kingsley Coffeen (+407) 15 years ago
Some people can swim around in the sea of knowledge all day and never get wet.

(I am a teacher and have this one on my classroom wall).
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Posted by AJS (+217) 15 years ago
THE STORY DOESN'T END WITH GOOD FRIDAY!
It's just the beginning . . . .

Visit a Church that teaches, "HE IS RISEN!"

and hear the rest of the story.

Jim Davis of AJS.
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Posted by Richard Bonine, Jr (+15535) 15 years ago
Churches this day were full of "CEO's". Christmas and Easter Only.
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Posted by AJS (+217) 15 years ago
A bird in the hand is better than two in the bush.
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Posted by AJS (+217) 15 years ago
An optimist is the guy who can always see the bright side of the other people's problems.

We all have undeveloped territory - it's under our hat.
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Posted by Cheryl Gaer-Barlow (+489) 15 years ago
WHAT THE . . .
WHAT DO YA MEAN . . .PRESS (1) FOR ENGLISH!

[This message has been edited by Cheryl Gaer-Barlow (edited 4/28/2008).]
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Posted by AJS (+217) 15 years ago
Press 5 for:

A loving husband is one who remembers his wife's birthday,
but forgets which one.

Jim of AJS
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Posted by Jonathan Sohl (+21) 15 years ago
Nothing is more annoying than a good example.
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Posted by AJS (+217) 15 years ago
What this country needs is a set of brakes that will stop the car behind us.

Telling a teen-ager the facts of life is like giving a fish a bath.
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Posted by Tony Ackerman (+187) 15 years ago
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend.
Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
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Posted by AJS (+217) 15 years ago
No Matter where you live:

The logic behind not signing surety is simple: When you sign for a debt without knowing how or when it might come due, you jeopardize your future.

Jim of AJS
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Posted by Steve Craddock (+2741) 15 years ago
Thanks to the advent of the modern computer, tasks that used to take two minutes now take two hours.

[This message has been edited by Steve Craddock (edited 5/1/2008).]

[This message has been edited by Steve Craddock (edited 5/1/2008).]

[This message has been edited by Steve Craddock (edited 5/1/2008).]
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Posted by AJS (+217) 15 years ago
From the time an infant tries to get his toes in his mouth, life is a continual struggle to make both ends meet.
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Posted by Cheryl Pieters (+484) 15 years ago
The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and leaky tire.

It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.

Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

[This message has been edited by Cheryl Pieters (edited 5/3/2008).]
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Posted by AJS (+217) 15 years ago
Nothing is as difficult to do as getting off a high horse.

Laughter is a tranquilizer with no side effects.

One of the advantages of a clean life is that you can distinguish between the flu and a hangover.

Jim of AJS
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Posted by Steve Craddock (+2741) 15 years ago
Beauty is in the eye of the beer-holder.

[This message has been edited by Steve Craddock (edited 5/5/2008).]
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Posted by AJS (+217) 15 years ago
Handle them carefully, for words have more power than atom bombs.

Ask God's blessings on your work, but don't ask Him to do it for you.

Jim of AJS
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