Posted by Richard Bonine, Jr (+15405) 12 years ago
#19 is my favorite.

1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. How in tarnation are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

10. Bad decisions make good stories.

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.

14. "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this - ever.

15. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Darn it!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail.
What did you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?

16. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

17. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

18. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

19. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.

20. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Bad part of town" routing option.

21. Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first saw it.

22. I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

23. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet my behind everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time!

24. It gets harder and harder to decipher the fine line between boredom and hunger.

25. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?

26. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent that one car from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!

27. One of the worse feelings is in that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.
Posted by B. Hunter (+107) 12 years ago
I really liked some of those... Thanks for sharing!
Posted by Matt - Schmitz (+170) 12 years ago
Good read Richard. Thanks for that.
Posted by Bill Freese (+471) 12 years ago
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah......
Posted by Kroberts (+27) 12 years ago
Loved it! Those are great!
Posted by jessiker (+282) 12 years ago
I am SO guilty of #17. :P I even have contacts saved in my phone as "Don't Answer"....
Posted by CS Hunt (+332) 12 years ago
those were great!
Posted by Brian A. Reed (+6122) 12 years ago
QFT, Richard. Thanks for sharing.

* Quote for truth
Posted by Cindy (+390) 12 years ago
Thanks for making my day, Richard! Those are great with a couple being laugh out loud funny!

And I can see myself in most of them