Please accept my deepest condolances at your lose.
My sister and brother-in-law were killed in the same car accident. They were placed for viewing at about 3 in the afternoon, and we know that most of the people who visited between that time and the next morning were family members. When I went in, the next morning, to arrange flowers, I noticed that my sister's hands had been moved. When I looked a little closer I realized that someone had stolen her wedding rings, and had rearranged her hands so that her right hand was covering her left, so that the theft wouldn't be immediatly obvious. She had a nice diamond wedding set, but it wasn't worth a great deal of money, so who ever took them probably didn't do it for the monatary value. It almost had to be someone in our family, and I have NEVER been more ashamed.
After watching the bickering, when their estate was settled, I began to understand, exactly, how petty people can become. Your situation is not unique, and I wish I had an answer that could help, but I don't, and I don't think anybody does either. You do have all of my sympathy, and I hope that eventually your heart and mind will find peace.